It was perfect. The reunion happened. It actually happened. I am surprised at myself for pulling it off. Everyone minus Jason came. The entire thing was a little bit disjointed, but I think it was a stroke of genius inviting Charles to come and be the great medium between the guys and the girls. On the one hand, he’s a huge dude. And on the other hand, he’s a huge girl. I mean, I knew I lost touch with a few people, but I never thought it would be so awkward. The worst part was that I never got around to saying anything to one of my oldest friends. One of my best friends. Not a word, except perhaps goodbye. That made me a little sad. But besides these shortcomings, it was great. We ate, we laughed, we shared, and we watched my slideshow. The slideshow I had desperately wanted to show everyone before we had left. It’s amazing how well it was put together. I honestly didn’t think it was that great until I saw it again with everyone else. I put my blood and sweat into it, and I think it might have showed. The love I have for this group is really astonishing. I love every single person who came, and I would do nothing to change any of them, ever.
There is so much rich history.
And so much more left to do.
Reunion 09… success.
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Extra Thoughts
Why it was Awkward
I suppose we were apart too long from each other to have been able to come together like the old days. Maybe it was always like this, and we had just glorified the past. Oh how selective our memories can be. Regardless, it seemed like there were lots of awkwardness between the guys and the girls. As mentioned above, there is usually a medium (Charles in this case) to unify such a group together, of this size. Interestingly enough, I think I used to be that medium. It sounds pompous I know, but I believe it to be the truth. Why? Well, it was because I really put effort into every single friendship in this group. I was close to every single girl, and every single guy. On the phone, in person, and even online, I took the effort. Of course, this was a long long time ago. I remember talking late at night. I remember going out for hours on end, talking and having fun. I remember discussing serious topics and issues that plagued us as teenagers and young adults. I remember connecting and really getting to know each person over time and… just developing a special bond. I mean, friendship really does takes effort.
What happened now of course, is that I have lost some of that.
I wish I could be better. I wish I could have kept in stronger contact with everyone else so that there wouldn’t have been any awkwardness. This is entirely my fault. I know most people didn’t really care about the awkwardness and the disunity that was there at the party. It was really tiny. But I have to fess up to it. I did the work of getting this together… without really doing the hardest and most rewarding job (I left that to Charles). That is to really talk and connect again with those I had lost touch with. That is what really keeps a large group of friends like this together. Coming together and trying to be friends a few times year isn’t going to work. It just isn’t. This is a major point that people need to understand. It takes cultivation and effort to maintain a strong friendship. So as a promise to myself, and my friends, if another reunion happens, I will try harder to connect and get to know each one of you all over again. Not because I have to, but because I want to.
It’s really interesting what my friend asked me today after the reunion.
“Why is it that after two years of almost nothing, we’ve come together, every single person. How did this happen, and why now?”
The answer is simple my friend.
No one can plan as good as me. (LOL, JK)
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My Family
I think this again and again. How far we’ve come. How much time has passed and how much we’ve changed.. and stayed the same. It’s taken 20 years. Twenty long years of a tenuous family relationship that bordered on the insane. It’s all coming together now. I don’t like to speak for everyone when I say this, but holy fucking shit, we’ve all matured. Me, my brother, and even my dad. My mom was always the mature one, so I really don’t think she’s changed at all. She’s the one kind constant in our lives that kept this pack of boys together.
It’s so hard to explain right now what is going through my head. I’ll go point by point.
1. I love my dad, I just need to show it more
2. My Mom works too hard and I need to help her out more
3. My brother has really changed. I still get weirded out and a little suspicious when he does things for me, but I’m learning
4. Family is once again important.
5. I am no longer the bastard child of my suppressed youth.
6. God… is good.