Archive for September, 2007

Test of Mind

Sunday, September 30th, 2007

Probably the only thing good about a crisis are two things. One, it prepares you for future situations, and two, it reveals character. You’d think with all the money and education on this side of the continent, that we’d be sufficient enough to survive through minor happenstances and unpleasant situations. I’ve been graced several times this year to see that the general public isn’t all what it seems to be. For a majority of you guys, when you watch an action movie and see one or two bystanders scream and panic, you probably think “I’d never do what he just did in that situation. I’d be levelheaded and probably even help catch that evil criminal.” Wrong.

The majority of the public can and will panic at any given time, given any situation that threatens your wealth, health, and reputation. It is VERY amusing to see people who have acted like they’ve always had things under control and have a cool attitude be shattered by very small events. Most people I’ve known who act tough in the end, are quite weak. I mean weak in every sense of the word. I will say it again. A majority of the population is weak. They are psychologically weak, and will break down in any given crisis. For example, about 80% of people think they drive better than others. The true demographic is that only 10% of the population are ‘good’ drivers. What does that say? that the 70% who said they were good drivers are not. People don’t understand the true meaning of being mentally sound. They will panic and feel an overwhelming sense of ‘What’s happening? What’s going on. Someone’s gotta help me. SOMEONE HELP ME. WHATS GOING ON. I DO NOT UNDERSTAND.’ and then eventually they start screaming and yelling, bestowing around them more panic and fear. Why are the majority of us weak? I believe that it’s probably from the lifestyle we’ve been given or leading. From being pampered from birth to adulthood, or from not facing any threatening situations at all. Although I’ll say it’s every parents duty to protect and shield their child from danger, so it’s not like everyone’s doing something wrong. But because of these contextual factors, the population as a whole is weak.

For example, I’ve seen videoes of people in Iraq, living in bombed in houses, maintaining their livelihood with peaceful and determined attitudes. If a bomb fell nearby, they would not panic and scream. No they would withstand it and continue to live. They would rationally deal with what had happened and make the best of it. The thought process of these people are completely different from the ego centric beliefs we have here. If a bomb fell near you what would happen? Granted that it does not happen as often as over there, but I think you see the point. Mental strength is just as important as physical strength. You must train it and develop it. I have much respect for those who can stay calm in situations and think their way out. In the end, in the whole grand scheme of things… the little events which occur in our lives are meaningless. Worrying and panicking is meaningless. Most of all, wasting precious moments in time for stupidity is meaningless. It is all about the choices we make and the important moments we decide are worth living for. Be prepared, because your life may one day depend on it.

Koreans… the new Chinese?

Wednesday, September 26th, 2007

When I say the new Chinese, I mean in the context of a North American perspective. Back when I was just a wee lad, I remember seeing many Chinese in Toronto going about their daily activities. Amusingly enough, all the caucasians that I was living around had the same opinion on these Chinese folk. They were loud, chittered profusely like monkies, and had a distinct odour. Not being Chinese myself, I simply agreed and laughed along. It seemed the Chinese were everywhere, overpopulating everything. Everytime you heard a foreign language, most likely it was Chinese. Small communities were sprouting out, and China town was becoming quite distinct. But that was several years ago…

Jumping to the present, it is obvious that things have changed. Sure, there are pockets of the Chinese community everywhere, working amongst themselves, but the new breed of ‘hey look at the group of asian fobs’, are now Korean. Yes, it is true. Everywhere you look now, at very populated areas, there is an influx of Koreans. Everywhere I go now, I hear my own language being chittered all around. At first, small social groups started to form, which now have become huge communities. What I find the most amusing about this observation, is that Koreans hate being compared to the Chinese, or any other race. We try hard to be unique, and most of the time we sort of are. But now we are exactly the same as the long time ago detested Chinese immigrants who are now an integrated part of our society. Koreans now have quite a bad name for themselves as overly proud asians who emit a foul odour that is closely related to wet fur. I hope the next generation will fare much better, and succeed. Not just in Starcraft too.

Rage Against the Parental Machine

Saturday, September 22nd, 2007

First of and foremost I’d like to apologize for my writing style. When re-reading what I have just typed from the crapspewing factory my brain is, I find it difficult to make any sense of what I’m trying to convey. Because writing is a form of art (to some), I’d probably compare mine to that of a kindergartener’s drawings. Hopefully over time my writing skills will increase, and upgrade to at least a 9th grade drawing level. With that said, I’ll continue this topic.

My parents are an interesting bunch. Sure they give alot of love, but it most of the time it is misguided. I’ve had my fair share of battles and shouting matches, but over the years it seemed to have died down.  In spite of that, after experencing tonight, this is completely untrue. Personally I had found everything to be going great in terms of yelling and fighting. Everything was courteous and although we did complain about each other sometimes, nothing was that serious. I had finally believed that I was in the green zone and that maybe an unspoken peace treaty had been built. But alas, my parents are great cloakers of their intentions and everything just went straight to hell. I won’t go into detail about what happened, but I will tell you the main basis for this little skirmish I had today.

From my point of view, they do not like my increasing independence. For about a year and a half now I had been relatively devoid of asking for any help and I would be mostly rely on my own abilties to go about my days. This independence had a profound effect on my parents. They started to figure out they weren’t needed as much anymore. They were becoming slightly obsolete in my life. I believe that this created some sort of fear and anxiety in my parents. I’ll be a little more specific and point you in the direction of my mother. Because of this, they felt the need to control a little more in my life. I would wake up perfectly fine in the morning and be ready for school, but they’d insist on checking up on me to make sure I wasn’t doing something else. They’d tell me to go sleep at a certain time, even though I had been dictating my own schedule for a year and a half without any trouble. It even got to the point where my mom would tell me to close the door when I exited a car. Yes, it was very stressful and annoying. Inadvertedly I must have had dissapointed reactions towards them which caused them to feel more useless. Subsequently, they tried harder to control, and I fought back just as hard to regain my independence. Sadly for them it built up a huge amount of inner stress and emotions, and without an outlet it eventually exploded in my face.

My parents are not quite logical, nor are they admittable to their own wrong doings. My mom has good intentions but the worst execution known to man. Moreover, it is almost impossible to communicate any of what I have just written down to them because of two reasons.
1. They will never believe that they were in the wrong. Even if they say they might have been wrong, they secretly inwardly believe that they never were.
2. Being a 2nd generation kid makes it almost impossible to use words to describe any of this.

Furthermore, I find that my parents find themselves at an advantage because of the language barrier. I understand their Korean quite well, and when they explain their argument I get what they’re trying to say. However, when I can just as easily defeat their logic as I would step on a fly, it is impossible to do so. They will not and can not understand what I am trying to show. Most of the time, the logic I use to fight their arguments are irrefutable and without flaw. This usually incites in them verbal silence.  Nevertheless, after a small while, they will once again begin to restate old defeated points and try to move onto another irrelevant topic that attacks my character.

I honestly wish sometimes I had white parents that I could have logical and reasonable arguments with. Not a father who hides in the basement at 2am in the morning waiting to turn off the fuse box switches.

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Apeshit

Saturday, September 22nd, 2007

I love this word. It depicts a powerful visual image in my mind of an ape going insane. I believe this word should be used more often, and perhaps replace the word ‘crazy’ when used in the context of “Holy shit, he just went crazy!”. Actually crazy wouldn’t even begin to describe the true meaning behind apeshit.

apeshit.jpg
A state of anger and rage that produces behavior more closely resembling that of an enraged ape than a human.
A term used to refer how one loses his/her sanity and thus initiates radical physical action upon anything due to immense anger. – Urbandictionary.com

 I hope one day that this word will be introduced into a real dictionary and be used by everyone.

Asking/Answering Questions in Lectures

Friday, September 21st, 2007

If another girl raises her hand to verify her own self worth I’m going seriously to shoot myself. There is nothing more dilapidating to the mind than listening to a student trying to get the answer to the question they already know.

I’ll use a couple of examples to illustrate.

Professor - “Since x + y = z then z – y = x … so this is how it is done. Any questions?”
Student – “Oh so z – y = x?”
Professor – “Yes.”
          
Professor – “For example, with alcoholics you can inject them with a substance which makes them nauseous whenever they consume alcohol. So the next time they drink they’ll remember the feeling and avoid drinking.”
Student – “Oh did you know they already did that?”
Professor – “….”

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